6 Principles to Keep Your Relationships Pure

6 Principles for Pure

No matter what your relationship status is, every Christian should strive to keep their relationship as pure as possible.


Here’s the 4HG definition

 pure (pyoor), adj. –

 untainted by selfishness, lust or pride.


Our perfect example of course, is Christ. In every interaction, Christ was motivated purely by love. It’s not possible for us to ever reach that level but there are ways to get closer to the ideal.

This is especially helpful for maintaining sexual purity (see 1 Cor 6:18). 

Here are 6 areas that affect our level of purity.



1. Faith: Know Your Boss –

Christ’s death and resurrection gave us the power to decide which path we follow. God has given us explicit instructions on how to have healthy, fulfilling relationships. But we must be committed to Him.


2. Purpose: Know Your Why –

Most of us are born into a script. We’ll go to school, get a good job and get married. It’s the lucky few whose God-given gifts and talents are encouraged and nurtured. These few often begin walking in their purpose very early. For the rest, looking for their mission begins only after life’s trophies fail to deliver. Find your purpose. Make it a central part of your life. You’ll have a lot less time to worry about the next step, whatever it is.


3. Integrity: Know Your Truth –

What are you really looking for when you engage in impure activities?

Our actions are based on our desires. You have to know what those are and how to meet them in legitimate ways.

Once you know what you really want, look at your actions. Do they match? Will they help you achieve your goal?

Shortcut question: If you truly desire to honor God, do your actions show that?

When they don’t, either you haven’t committed to God or you don’t trust Him. The two often go hand in hand.


4. Community: Know Your Tribe –

Humanity is designed to work in groups. Think about those you spend the most time with, including your entertainment choices.

Is your tribe supporting you in your goal for purity? Are they committed to purity in their own lives? Do they encourage you or demean you? Are there multiple people you can look at and say, “Yes! That’s the type of relationship I want!”?

This is challenging for many because we’re not willing to move out of our comfort zone. We don’t want to try new churches or new groups. We don’t want to make new friends or change our entertainment. New is weird. New is crazy.

But for purity, new is necessary.


5. Salvation: Know You’re Broken

Jesus came to set the captives free. It’s impossible to have been in bondage without scars and trauma.

The old you was dying. Incapable of choosing life. The new you is growing but needs nutrients. The old has to be redeemed, purified, brought into the light.

Unfortunately, we prefer to ignore the old us. We assume that conversion means our past issues are just that, in the past. But a life of faith is more than just prayer and church. It is a transforming of the old into the new. It’s a process.


6. Multiplication: Know You’re a Vessel

Every gift, talent and achievement we have was given by the grace of God. Partly because He loves us. Partly because we’re made in His image. But also partly because He wants us to pass it on. God wants us to use what we have to show others love. 

When we’re hurt or outraged, that’s the time to remember the grace and mercy that God has shown us. We were once as mean and despicable in His sight as the person we’re upset with. But He showed us and continues to show us loving-kindness. He wants us to do the same.


Were these principles helpful? We’d love to hear your thoughts.

Look for a more in-depth guide coming in November. 


About Shay Malone

Shay Malone, a certified Christian life coach, provides education, inspiration and resources to improve emotional well-being. She specializes in working with clients to overcome emotional roadblocks rooted in childhood trauma. She is owner and life coach at 4HisGlory Consulting, where the emotional meets the practical and is transformed by the spiritual.

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